My sister died one year at the end of October, and the idea of celebrating joyous holidays like Thanksgiving and Christmas while grieving such a great loss felt unbearable. Tasks that were once joyful—like baking holiday cookies and opening presents—suddenly felt heavy with the weight of remembrance.
So we did something new: Our entire family rented a house for several days in December. We spent the week enjoying the wintry landscape outdoors, curling up by roaring fires in the living room, and cooking and playing games together. Though the ache of missing my sister didn’t dissipate, there was a freedom in forging new memories.
In the years that have passed, we’ve continued renting a house from time to time, incorporating our ‘new’ tradition even as we gradually revive some of our other traditions.
Our lives are made up of seasons of growth and change, but sometimes we get stuck in patterns and forget to adapt. At one point in time, all traditions were new experiences. New traditions don’t erase the significance of our old ones rather, like love, they shift over and find ever more room in our heart.
Our family traditions need not be set in stone. Perhaps this year, you can give yourself permission to reevaluate. You may just find a lightened load waiting for you on the other side.
Embracing New Traditions
Kristin Demery
A career in journalism set Kristin Demery up to one day publish her own stories of living this wild, precious life. She is now an author of numerous books—including her newest, One Good Word a Day (Tyndale, 2021)—and part of a trio of writers collectively known as The Ruth Experience. Kristin served as a newspaper and magazine editor, and her work has been featured in a variety of publications, including USA Today. An adventurer at heart, she loves checking items off the family bucket list with her husband and three daughters.