How to Live Out Your Faith As An Example for Your Kids

I’ve been drooling over extraordinary pillows for the past year. Yes, there is such a thing as extraordinary pillows. They live at Anthropologie, where it smells like a magical forest.

I want them. However, they’re a gazillion dollars. You can’t always get what you want, but Target came to the rescue with some adorable knockoffs. So, for Mother’s Day, I pointed them out and mentioned, “They would be a great gift from the kiddos!” (Wink wink.)

I see them enthroned as jewels on my decade-old stained couch, and I smile. They’re pretty. It’s as simple as that. Or is it?

It seems these lovely pillows have awakened some alternate ‘Type A’ personality in me:

“Do you really have to mash it behind your head like that?”

“Please don’t use the pillow as a food tray.”

“Why is every single pillow on the floor?!”

I’m dying inside, and my poor family is no longer allowed to relax. It might disturb the decorative pillows.

Of course, I’m being ridiculous. What’s the point of having pillows if I’m worried they’ll be ruined at the slightest touch?

Questions of the Faith

I’ve found myself asking the same question about my faith. What’s the point of claiming faith in front of my kids if I’m too afraid it will fall apart when life leans hard against it?

Do they see my shoulders tense when the dirty cleats of life tread on it? Do they sense that, deep down, I sometimes question if my faith can be destroyed? And, if so, what will this model to them about my trust in God?

But in the moments I’ve dared to pick up my faith, stomp on it, wrestle it, and punch it with questions and bitterness, I’ve realized that real faith is for real life. And real life doesn’t smell like Anthropologie. God doesn’t want us to be afraid to throw all our junk at it full force. The faith He gives is not a cheap knockoff; it’s the real deal. 

Paul tells us, “We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed” (2 Corinthians 4:8-9, NIV). If we’re taking our faith along for the ride, it will endure the same refining. And, let’s be honest, everyone who lives under the same roof will have a front-row seat—if we let them.

PURSUING PERFECTION

You can’t scroll through social media or flip through a women’s magazine and not find a list of ways to be a better mom. We are a generation of mothers who can Google anything and find out how to do things ‘right’, which implies we think we’re doing something wrong. Our children see us posting our ‘perfect’ life on social media. They aren’t allowed to eat the freshly baked cookies until we’ve photographed them from three angles. I mean, really. Who are we trying to impress? 

When they see us strive this way, we normalize this behavior for them. They will grow up putting the same pressure on themselves, thinking something is amiss if they don’t portray perfection to others, translating this into their spiritual lives.

And the most tragic result is that if we try to hide our failings, fears, doubts, insecurities, and faith-faltering from our children, they will hide theirs from us. They may not want to get the pillows dirty and upset mama.